Sigh.

Here I am again. Same same.

Instead of writing this at Home Home I’m down here in LA. I didn’t want to drive up this year because of La Nina and how we it was going to be.

The weather will be unpredictably wet and that’s not worth the drive.

2025.

The year is coming to an end and I’m trying to pull something out of my ass for my yearly bah humbug to all and like the past couple of years, it’s been a chore.

I’m not saying that it is a chore to write, it’s just that my motivation is gone.

I have no motivation to do anything but to do the minimum.

Minimum.

The bare bare minimum.

Sigh.

2025.

That’s what it is.

What can I say about it?

Well, it’s been a year.

It’s probably been one of the worse years in terms of American for a long long time.

I mean, I guess with Covid back in 2020, but in a way with the pandemic, that was beyond our control and we had to just cope because it was happening to everyone.

2025 though, though, this one took the cake.

If I look over 2025 objectively, for me, on a personal level, it was fine. Just the lack of motivation.

I still have a job. I’m still “healthy”, I think. I’m not suffering anything besides the malaise of life.

Sure, my motivation and any positivity is pretty much gone and I’m just doom and gloom because that’s how everything around me is looking, but I’m still me.

Life is life and I’m cruising through it.

But fuck me…world, America, work is just a fucking dumpster fire and I can’t get away from it.

That’s 2025.

“The Year of the Dumpster Fire”

At least I still have my video games and k-dramas.

2025.

It started out with a literal fire and that just shaped the trajectory of how the year was going to be with Trump being President.

Just one shit show after another with everything in our country.

Sigh.

So, let’s start. Let’s lay it out.

WORK

Work is work.

It’s shit now with everything that happened with the corporate greed.

I know that they are trying to make the agency seem good and prime it for a sell, but it’s a dying industry.

So, they are just making it worse for everyone.

It’s a miserable time with everything.

Bare minimum.

I do what I’m asked.

No more. No less.

It has to be.

It has to be.

TRAVEL

I didn’t have many trips this year.

I did my yearly #specialweek trip but that was just ruined with the firing of my boss. I had a great time exploring Carmel and Paso, but that firing weighed heavily on my mind.

I drove home for my yearly summer trip but didn’t get to do much with Galette’s injury and I got sick early for most of my first week.

Then the second week was just work, updating my resume and such…so, it wasn’t like it was a good exploratory trip or relaxing trip like most years.

Plus, with Crumble, it was a little difficult as I was trying to get him and everyone else use to each other. Relish still doesn’t like Crumble and I’m trying to be patient and get them to a point where I can leave them together for longer periods than the hour or hour and a half for when Galette and I are out for a walk.

Maybe when he gets out of his asshole gremlin kitten phase and leaves Relish alone. Possibly.

Hopefully things will be better in 2026 since this is the new low baseline.

Not many trips during the summer because of the new boss and because of Gifu’s memorial.

With the economy showing signs of a recession, it was also a decision to try and save up and shelter down when it does happen.

2026.

Hopefully things will bounce back, but with this shitshow of an administration, no fucking clue of how it’ll be.

HEALTH

I’m alive.

I’m lazy.

I’m unmotivated.

Getting a better grasp of my stomach issues and working out keto with the help of Kai and such, but I’m not strict about it.

I’m on and off, but overall, I’m healthy or I think I’m healthy.

I’ll know how my cholesterol is in the next few months, but I’m breathing. I can walk.

I’m not in much or any pain and overall, I’m sleeping well-ish.

I’m as healthy as I can be at the moment.

With the lack of motivation to do anything, comes the lack of motivation to actually cook healthy things.

Not even cooking healthy things, just cooking period. I find myself ordering take out more and more.

Sigh.

Sure I can always be healthier and let’s see how 2026 shapes up.

I really need to setup a routine and change things up, but it seems I’m so stuck on this schedule/routine that I have.

I need to make an effort.

I need to change.

2026.

HELP!

PROJECTS

I started a new project this year and it’s something to do to help me not focus on the crumbling democracy that is America.

I started Ngai Sit Faan, a new cooking channel.

I’m a content creator now.

I guess it’s something to just get me back into cooking, which I miss and to be a little more creative in what I cook, and also, get me back into creating things.

I’m not trying to chase clicks or view, but just something to fill my time.

My views are shit. I’m still trying to understand this whole content curation and creating thing and how to get likes, but ultimately, it’s something for me to get me through this funk.

I don’t know how long it’ll last, but it’s something to do, I guess.

I’m still trying to figure out my brand, my videos, and how I want them to be.

So far, it’s just low lift, simple and I kind of like that.

It’s not polished. It’s not clean. It’s not great.

But it’s mine. It’s something.

Given how unmotivated I am with any projects since the pandemic, I’ll take it for what it is.

Let’s see how it flourishes in 2026.

PETS

Crumble.

The newest member of the horde.

It was impromptu and very unplanned.

It all started with Relish having health issues around May and June. During that time, we did a blood test and found out that she doesn’t have FIDS so I’m able to get a new cat if I ever wanted.

After coming back from Gifu’s memorial, I asked Bea if there any new kittens for adoption and there is a black kitten available, which is what I’m looking for.

I got Crumble the next day.

It’s been an experience.

Sometimes I regret it because Relish isn’t liking it. I thought she would want a friend whenever I leave on vacation, but I guess I’m wrong.

He’s a beast. Wild and mischievous. Maybe it’s been a while, but I don’t remember Relish being this crazy when she was a kitten.

But overall, everyone is fine.

Galette is still Galette. I’m understanding her better each year, but she’s still that stray that has her Chihuahua personality.

Crumble is growing and hopefully calms down soon.

Relish is Relish, chilling on her own independence, trying to keep her distance from Crumble.

I think Relish is fine with Crumble as long as he doesn’t try to touch her or fuck with her.

But that’s not going to happen.

These Furkids seem to be the only good thing that’s happening in my life right now.

They are the things that keeps me focused and working.

I hope they stay healthy and grow and hopefully we become a more relaxed household.

2026, bring it.

2025.

It’s been a year.

A shit year.

Overall, it’s not unlike any other year post pandemic on a personal level.

On the world level, a dumpster fire.

2026.

Hoping it gets better. Hoping a death comes and a time for healing and celebration.

A time of retribution.

2026.

Let’s right the wrongs and steer us back to something worth living form.

2025, I bid you adieu.

2026.

Be gentle.

Let’s….take a deep breath and grow.

2026.

Bring it.