The count. 6.

6.

This would be my sixth entry in this little void of mine this year. This is probably my least output ever.

I’m sure there were years that came close, but I had an excuse, my writing projects.

I don’t have any writing projects this year. Nothing.

With us being in an extended lockdown and this is a new normal, I have nothing going on.

I’m just….un-motivated.

Life.

This is life now.

Procrastination.

Irresponsible.

Just make it through another day.

Make it through another month.

Another year.

Life.

October 25, 2021.

Great Auntie passed away.

Her health had been declining for the past couple of months. She’d been in and out of hospice/hospital and now, she’s at rest.

The funeral will be next weekend, but mom won’t be coming with the pandemic and all. I’ll be there.

I must.

I haven’t gone over to uncle’s that much in the past year or two due to the pandemic. Didn’t want to expose myself or my aunts and uncles because they are older.

Thankfully, after most everyone was vaccinated, I was able to go visit and party with them over the 4th of July weekend for Great Auntie’s 91st birthday party.

It was great seeing everyone again, but sadly that would be the last time I see her.

Work.

Fuck Work.

I don’t know how long it has been, but I’m feeling it.

Maybe it’s been during the whole pandemic, but my old friend is back.

As mentioned before, it’s not the old friend that I grew up with, but the more mature grown-up version of it.

The meh-ness and blah blah of life.

I don’t remember if this is the same one that I went to therapy for or not, but I know it’s here.

It’s different.

I don’t know which is worse, but this one slowly sucks the motivation out of me. It sucks the productivity out of me.

Life.

Just a blahness of meh and mahs.

When will it end?

How can I cope?

I don’t know.

Time?

It’s always time.

Time is the answer for this little passive life liver.

It’ll get better.

The light will shine through.

There will always be light.