Who’s love?

I don’t know.

But, I know, at this moment in my life, the most important love is mine of myself.

That’s important and everyone should know that. In the end, that’s all that matters.

So much comes from loving yourself.

Acceptance.

Confidence.

Joy.

High.

So much.

We all should work at loving ourselves.

It’s healthy.

Be healthy.

The sun’s out today.

It feels like summer, finally. Back to SoCal weather that everyone loves.

It’s okay in my book. Glad that we broke out of the cloudiness that was hanging around for the past few weeks.

I was feeling it.

The ickiness.

It’s at bay. It didn’t come at me strong. It was just there, in the back of my mind.

I need to keep it at bay.

I hope to keep it at bay.

I will keep it at bay.

What do I have planned on this lovely and gorgeous day?

Nothing per usual.

Staying in the house. Catching up on my shows and movies.

So many.

So behind.

I did some light cleaning this morning and I have the rest of the afternoon and the weekend to unwind.

No cooking planned, but I’m aching to bake something.

I don’t know why, but I want to bake.

I know I use to associate baking with the ickiness, the lost years of muddled thoughts.

Now, I think I just want to eat something baked.

Scones?

Biscuits?

Cinnamon rolls?

No idea.

Something.

Just something.

I’ll figure something out. I usually do.

I want to be somewhat productive this weekend as I plan to lounge and do nothing.

Something.

Brain.

Writing.

It’s different.

It’s changed so much.

My style.

Can’t connect thoughts. I can’t connect into my consciousness anymore.

It’s not deep. All shallow and superficial.

These aren’t anything like my earlier entries. Honest and open.

It was me baring my soul.

It was my therapy.

With each word, each entry, my anger subsides until it boils again.

It was a few steps forward and leaps back, but slowly, progress.

There was progress.

Look at me now.

Look at my previous entry.

To be liked.

People like me.

They like who I am.

They appreciate me.

To be liked.

Does that fix everything, or did I fix most things so I can be liked?

I’m sure it goes hand-in-hand.

Progress.

Age.

Honesty.

A Whole New World.

It was a whole new world all right. It was a different me.

Touching upon what happened last week at the happy hour, I sang karaoke for the first time in years on a stage.

The Debs Cama put our name down for a duet and that’s the song we sung.

I sang the princess part, of course.

Of course.

I felt fine. I wasn’t shy. I wasn’t afraid.

It was what it was, and it was something old, but new.

Something.

Different.

It’s the new me. It’s a better me.

Enjoying life.

Enjoying my surroundings.

Enjoying whatever it is that I’m doing.

Now I’m in a Whole New World…with me.