It’s been a few weeks. Here I am.

I wasn’t gone or procrastinating but wanted was busy with school and sql.

I wanted to do my tests and finish any online classes that I was taking.

Looking over all the classes I’m currently taking, the Power BI class will definitely lapse as I learned as much as I can in terms of the usage of the software. There are limitations of what I want to do in terms of being able to share content with the agency. We need additional licenses for it. I’ll figure something out.

The second Python class is nearing its end. I’m so behind on that, the class closed, but I still have access to all the material and tests and practice. I haven’t put much thought into it yet. I will once I get this SQL class over. It’s more important. It’s tough.

Then, I’ll get on the PowerApps class as I figure out what class to take next at UCLA. I’m into this continuing education thing. It’s good for me.

New skills. New growth.

Let’s continue.

I’m taking a little break from my SQL test as I jot this little note down. It’s been a while and I wanted to get my finger tapping again. I need to. Maybe it’ll help me figure out Question 2.

Fuck Question 2.

Just fuck it.

Fuck work.

Not going to write about work.

Just fuck it.

Apologize.

That came up again today.

Weird. Co-ink-a-dink.

The first song that came on was Apologize by that one group that I’m too lazy to look up and now Rihanna came up with Take A Bow and one of the first lines is Don’t apologize…

Apologies.

I don’t have any to give. I don’t have any one to apologize to. Maybe to myself, but that is an everyday thing.;

Let’s get back to this. Let’s get back to me in a different way.

2019.

The new Phong. The new me.

I decided to be a little more positive this year. Looking at the bright side. It’s a battle.

I’m making an effort to not be grumpy and to not let work things get to me.

It’s a struggle some days.

I had a bad one the other day. Nothing was working. I couldn’t figure out some logic on Flow as things are broken.

Sigh.

Fuck it.

Positivity.

It’s definitely a change in outlook. It’s definitely a change in lifestyle.

Being a realist comes so easy. It is what it is.

Positivity takes some training.

It takes some practice.

Along with the positivity, I’m making an effort to be a little more social and a little nicer.

A new childlike playfulness was a result.

For example, before I would grunt or don’t even acknowledge people that would say hi to me. Now, I’ll over enthusiastically say hi and great them and talk to them.

Sure, a part of it is that I’m fucking with them, like I was fucking with them when I was ignoring them. I’m fucking with them in another way.

I can’t deprive myself of fucking with people, can I? It’s what brings me some sense of joy.

We all should have a little enjoyment and fun every day. This is mine.

I’m not a total dick about it…but I am.

Some find it endearing…for some reason.

Sigh.

It’s almost a month-and-a-half of this positivity. Let’s see how long it’s going to last.

I think it’ll be a permanent thing. Sure, I’ll have some bad days, but overall, it’ll be good.;

It’ll be good.

Life.

It’s going.

Another Chinese Year down and another just started.

It’s the Year of the Pig, the earth Pig, like mom.

It’s usually never a good year for the person with the same Zodiac sign. I hope mom will be okay this year without any major mishaps. I have faith.

For my fellow Rams and Sheeps, it supposed to be a good year this year.

It seems to be shaping up that way. See, positivity.

The positivity helps. The stress level at work is still there but seems to be more manageable. A little bit better.

Things will be better. Definitely will be better.

I spent New Year’s Eve at Great Aunties with Uncle Joe and the family. It was great being there and seeing everyone again. The celebration was subdued of course because of Great Uncle’s passing, but it was much much needed family time.

The day before I went to Whore’s wedding with the new guy. I don’t even remember him. Apparently, I met him for like a few minutes. I had no impression of him. He never left one.

It was a small quiet ceremony.

It was what it was and now, I have Nick’s wedding to go to and then no more?

Yay.

It is February and it is the month of lovey dovey love.

Bah humbug!

Bah humbug indeed.

Positivity!

It’s cold. Wet.

The wind blows its easy breeze.

It’s weeks like these that reminds me of home home. Dark skies and everything is wet.

The wind pierces the body and chills to the bone.

The California artificial cold spell inside blows down on me, chilling me even more. I know I should have learned my lesson and move to a different table as I tell myself time and time again, but I’m stubborn. I like the window.

I like the views.

But this draft kills me every time.

EVERY. DAMN. FUCKING. TIME.

It kills.

Dead.

Another storm moves down on us. More rain in our future. The next few days.

Wet.

Wetter.

Wettest.

If I had to choose, I would choose the snow over this wetness.

There’s a Snowmageddon up in Seattle now. It’s so bad, there’s a state of emergency.

Buses and snow plows slide down the steep hills of Seattle.

Blizzard conditions.

Cold and frozen.

I think I would much prefer that then what we have here.

I wouldn’t be driving. I’d be walking. Metro.

Commuting.

Driving would be limited. Groceries will be limited, but I’d make it work.

I’d make it work.

Cold.

Wet.

Chilled to the bone.