I haven’t written anything in a while. Just posted something earlier tonight. It was a private entry. Just wrote about things that’s been happening in my life right now. Things at work, situations, things going through my head. Just about my life in general. Boring stuff really.

I don’t know. I guess I’ve been reevaluating my life in general lately. What’s been happening? Work, confusion, confusion, confusion. That’s generally my life.

There are many thoughts that run through my mind on a constant basis, and I still can’t figure things out. As soon as I think I am coming close to finding a conclusion to one of my little problems, the solution never satisfies and sometimes just creates bigger problems.

I know many and almost all of you don’t know what I’m rambling on here, and that is a good thing. Don’t think I want to tell you and I really don’t think you’d want to know.

It’s almost another year come and gone. I have started this journal well over 6 months ago. Looking back, reading my posts, I have to say, some of them are intense.

A friend of mine who read it says it was very brave of me to write what I did. Especially some of my earlier entries.

Looking back, was I really brave, or was I stupid to just let everyone in the way I did. With this journal, I put myself before you, naked. You clearly see who I am, and yet have no clue as to who I am. I honestly don’t know who I am.

I guess because it is nearing the end of another year, and a new one starts in just a few days, I am starting to reevaluate my life.

What’s changed? How have I grown up? Many things changed and happened to me this year. The biggest was my father passing of course. Others are just a growing friendship with someone I most definitely don’t want to lose touch with, and I’m just growing up and dealing with new problems and situations that I’ve never experienced. Hurting people, getting hurt. Just life I guess.

Meeting new people, making new friends, experiencing new things.

Lisa said something to me the other day that struck me as a little funny. She said I’m a late bloomer. She’d always figured me as such. We were talking about something that none of you guys need to know, but anyways, it struck me as funny. It may not make sense to any of you, but here goes. I’ve always been an old soul, way mature for my age. When I was younger, my teachers would always tell me how mature I act, so on and so forth. Yet, I’m a late bloomer. Just find it ironic that I’m such an old soul, and so mature for my age, that I’m a late bloomer. It’s just stupid funny. Something that only I find funny I guess. Writing that just now, I just realized how stupid that was. But who cares.

Anywho, I’ve been a little more social than usual, and more lazy than usual. Not a good mix, cause it just means more money spent on unnecessary things. I’ve been going out and watching movies and having dinner with a friend and just hanging out. Don’t know why I go out but I do. Meh, as we say. Meh indeed.

Well, Christmas is upon us and for those who don’t know me. Bah Humbug to all. I’m going home this Christmas. It would be nice to get out of the city and see family again. To have one of those large family get togethers where we’ll just sit, talk, laugh, and just hang out. There are some new additions to the family that I would like to me and others that I would like to catch up with. I think it will be good. Be around some old friends and family. Hopefully I get a chance to relax. Here’s to hoping.